SiD’s Sphere!!

she may have been groping in the dark for words, but those that she did find were not the ones she was hoping for.

it was dejavu all over again. the way she had to use up all the energy she had just to suck in a gasp of air that seemed to have thinned around her in a matter of seconds, reminded her of another time, other words that had had the same effect on her. even after she was able to breath in bursts, she couldn’t let the invisible hand let go of her heart that was clutching on to it so tightly, it felt like it would be pulled out of her any moment. for the second time in her life, she knew what it felt like to have life sucked out of you.

For most Pakistani girls, there’s no escaping the tea and trolley parade. My time, too, has finally come.

I’m not opposed to the idea of settling down. As a matter of fact, I even propagate early marriages. So why am I so unsettled, when my parents have suddenly become obsessed with the job finding me ‘A Suitable Boy’.

The same blog entry referred to above, holds the answer to this question.

Marriage should not mean ‘tying ourselves down’. It should mean finding new wings. One of my favourite lines from a Bee Gees song is ‘With no one beside you, you’re going nowhere.’ And examples of our own parents shows us that there is no better support than a spouse.

If anyone reading this was with me last Wednesday, I meant what I said in the car on our way back to Sadaf’s. ‘I will give up all my dreams for a man who’s ready to make me his’.

Call me idealistic (and a lot of people do), but I want someone to fall head over heels madly in love with me. And even with my incredibly low self esteem, I believe that is possible.

So even if I dismiss that possibility, the idea of being put on display is highly repulsive to me. Maybe, that is how matches were made in times gone by, and that is how parents came to become each others’ soul-mates, but in this day and age, that is completely unacceptable. Specially with the kind of world that I have been exposed to, I cannot stand the idea of parents and in some cases, the ‘larka’ himself coming over and match me against a set of criteria and determine if I’m good enough a match. The greatest flaw of this system is that physical appearance, apparent affluence and disguised manner play a greater role than my personality itself. If nothing more, it makes me feel like nothing more than merchandise on display in a store which is waiting for the right customer. What’s worse? If the customer considers taking me off the shelf worth it, he doesn’t even have to pay a price. My parents, however, might have to pay it. Or maybe, it’s just the packaging in which I am to be delivered, that will cost them a great deal. There can be no better example of a seller paying an exorbitant price to get rid of his own merchandise.

My friends make me feel special every day. Specially with their constant Punjabi and P&G puns, but this particular time, they wanted to make my day even more great. Even though I completely spoiled the surprise they were planning, this particular poem made my day. Specially because I had requested something to be written for me.

All of you who feel like wishin me a belated happy birthday can follow suit and write sthg for me. doesn’t have to be as corny as this piece.

My friends make me feel special every day. Specially with their constant Punjabi and P&G puns, but this particular time, they wanted to make my day even more great. Even though I completely spoiled the surprise they were planning, this particular poem made my day. Specially because I had requested something to be written for me.

All of you who feel like wishin me a belated happy birthday can follow suit and write sthg for me. doesn’t have to be as corny as this piece.

My friends make me feel special every day. Specially with their constant Punjabi and P&G puns, but this particular time, they wanted to make my day even more great. Even though I completely spoiled the surprise they were planning, this particular poem made my day. Specially because I had requested something to be written for me.

All of you who feel like wishin me a belated happy birthday can follow suit and write sthg for me. doesn’t have to be as corny as this piece.